Book: The No-Girlfriend Rule by Christen Randall
Reviewed by Rallie X
Rating: 5/5
The only unrealistic thing about this book? A queer D&D party with no skittles tieflings, or any tieflings at all! All jokes aside, this is the most accurate representation of what it's like to play a D&D game that I think I've ever seen outside actual plays (which obviously don't count since you're literally watching them play). I gasped when Gloria (a DREAM dragon master secret keeper) ran a session zero, I was locked in for the first combat (again, so realistic, including "your character doesn't know what those are" reminders to experienced players), and got more and more invested in the party along with the characters/PCs. Like, I am considering this fantasy-adjacent because as Hollis grows more comfortable with Sorcery and Secrets (S&S) the narrative shifts from the players at the table describing their actions to the cinematic experience that takes over the imagination when you're really locked into a scene. This book has magic in it and it's not just the magic of friendship and gay awakenings.
With all that, I loved this book. I laughed, I giggled, I snickered, I rolled my eyes and shook my fists at the awful boyfriend and co; and of course I sobbed my eyes out, sometimes for Hollis and sometimes (okay a lot more often probably) for Honoria (Hollis got like a soft weeping, Honoria got full on sobs because I was crying for her and for Hollis. If you haven't played D&D that might not make sense, but trust me, it does).
All of the members of Hollis' S&S game were so sweet, and I loved how diverse they were - not just in terms of race/gender/sexuality (which Randall very much incorporates; there are only two white players at the table), but in terms of personality. I gotta say that Iffy was my favorite from the first moment, the way she was so welcoming to Hollis as they developed that very specific "sharing a ride to a weekly social event" friendship brought so much life to the book. And oh my lord does Randall nail the terrible boyfriend with terrible friends characters - my book is full of stickies that say "dump him" and "girl that's not your boyfriend" and "that's baby bitch behavior" (the last often references their clown Secret Keeper Landon rather than her garbage boyfriend Chris, but he's always included in my ire). No D&D is better than bad D&D.
I loved how Hollis' self-realization rolled out through the book, the coming-of-age/gay awakening story isn't a new one but Randall tells it in a refreshing way that on some level reflects what a gay awakening can feel like/look like at any stage in life. There's nothing childish or immature about her experience and what Randall writes; Hollis is realistic, her struggles are far too relatable, and her path towards the rainbow being in part guided by a roleplaying game is so Real on just a very human level (how many eggs have been cracked due to self-discovery at the table? More than could ever be counted).
Gloria runs a dream table - open communication, giving players a chance to shine, failing forward, playing special spicy guys (albino faun rogue with a not-tressym 💜)... I would've given anything to play at a table like that. Because the other part of what makes this book so powerful is how realistic the "no-girlfriend" rule is. Gender getting in the way of being "allowed" to play is such a common experience especially for younger players, and Christen Randall writes a roadmap of possibilities and inclusion. This book isn't just great, this book has a little bit of healing to offer those of us who didn't have/couldn't be a Gloria.